I am a Fire Wife

So many women scoff at me when I tell them that not only am I a stay at home mom, but also a fire wife. As soon as the words escape my mouth I can see them rolling their eyes and beginning to pass judgement. How could a woman, in this day and age, revert to identifying herself with her husband's job? For many women, their husband's job is just that, a job or a career. They come home at night and walk through the door, shedding all of their work-persona when they take off their shoes and coat. For us, my husband's job is woven so deeply in our lives that it is a part of who we are and how we live our lives. 

Being married to a firefighter means being prepared at any moment to be a single parent indefinitely. What my husband sacrifices daily, even hourly, affects my family to the core. He misses birthdays, and holidays (years like this year are tough when his shift day falls on every major holiday - I'm not exaggerating). He has missed milestones in our son's development and has had to watch them on video instead of getting to experience them. We plan our outings, and major events around my husband's shift schedule and pray that the ones we cannot control (such as the birth of our second child) don't happen while he's unreachable on shift. Even small outings such as shopping trips are planned around him being home and able to help. While my husband is out saving families and lives, his family is at home patiently waiting for him to return to continue ours. Don't get me wrong, we live our lives while he is gone and each day comes and goes. What needs to be done gets done, but our son knows when his dad isn't here, and the family can tell that something is missing. We wait for him to walk through the door to be whole again, but we wake up every morning knowing that he might not be home again at all. 

This is why I am a Fire Wife and not just a stay at home mom. His career has become our lives as well and we live in the constant reminder that his job could mean that he doesn't come home. We sacrifice alongside of him as he misses out on major events, and we are there to support him as much as he supports us. Firefighting is in our family.